Scott McFarland is a Lecturer in the Department of English at the University of Illinois at Chicago. View more of author's work here. Contact author.
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A Basic Requirement of Modern Life It seems Congress is “sitting on its hands.” The governing elite “doesn’t give a damn.” Many experts have a “sick feeling” about America’s future prospects. The New York Times, you are indispensable to our factories and homes and commercial establishments. You facilitate our lives considerably. You have the ability to send news without any difficulty over the entire world through electric waves. You can utilize the power of the First Amendment to relieve Americans from “all tiring muscular work.” You can ask how often public opinion rises up with a singular message. You can ask experts to account for this phenomenon. You can wonder whether this might become even more common in the future. And you can generalize. Don’t we all love to generalize? Isn’t science itself a quest for generalizations? It’s certainly true that “most Americans were raised by mass media.” Kids are in fact “demonstrating, protesting, espousing sexual freedom, and experimenting with drugs.” Generational conflict is universal. The following factors may indeed cause actual outcomes to be materially different from those projected: 1) access to capital; 2) changes in market demand; 3) stranded costs from deregulation; 4) failure to exceed customers’ minimal standards of satisfaction; 5) refinancing of existing debt; 6) terrorism 7) war; 8) unforeseen natural disasters; 9) unresolved litigation. You can ask: “How real are these costs? How many are unseen? How will we recoup?” Sure, the intelligence and character of the masses is incomparably lower than the intelligence and character of the few who read The New York Times. Americans do live in fear of being eliminated from the economic cycle. The production and distribution of commodities does remain “unorganized.” People from different countries do suffer for “the want of food.” People from different countries are indeed killing each other “on a regular basis.” I know things are getting so “regular, normal, and comprehensible” that pretty soon we’re not going to know what to do with ourselves, that we’re approaching a “Copernican moment.” I’m certainly aware that we’re about to “learn something new about our place in the universe.”
Train Station The zoo cream cork has cooled that the devilment plant stand Lacrosse the gum tree, logistical arachnids are being highpantsed True, honey and logistics have been bubblegum espressos
Boiardi In 1914, a sixteen-year-old Italian boy arrived at Ellis Island. He soon found a job in the kitchen Ettore Boiardi’s likeness appears on ConAgra’s Chef Boyardee canned pastas. Boiardi’s last TV The original Chef Boyardee dinner for four cost 60 cents. It included uncooked spaghetti, sauce, In 1971, Consolidated Mills changed its name to ConAgra, a combination of con for In 1919, Boiardi moved to Cleveland to become Head Chef at the Hotel Winton. In 2009, In 1924, Boiardi opened his first restaurant, Giardino d’ Italia, in Cleveland. A special kitchen on In 1945, Boiardi sold his business to American Home Foods for six million dollars. In 1985, Chef In 1985, Boiardi died in Parma, Ohio. He used good pure beef, the kind you’d ask for at the
Hollywood Where have I been? I have been hunting at the hollywood. Now make my bed soon, for I am wearied from The Opening Image, and fain would lie down. And what met me there? Oh, I met with my true love. Now make my bed soon, for I am wearied from The Inciting Incident, and fain would lie down. And what did my true love give me? Eels fried in a pan. Now make my bed soon, for I am wearied from The First Plot Point, and fain would lie down. And what got my leavings? My hawks and my hounds. Now make my bed soon, for I am wearied from The First Pinch, and fain would lie down. And what became of them? They stretched their legs out and died. Now make my bed soon, for I am sick at heart from The Midpoint, and fain would lie down. You fear I am poisoned? Oh, yes, I am poisoned. Now make my bed soon, for I am sick at heart from The Second Pinch, and fain would lie down. What do I leave to you? Four and twenty milk cows. Now make my bed soon, for I am sick at heart from The Second Plot Point, and fain would lie down. And what do I leave to my sister? My gold and my silver. Now make my bed soon, for I am sick at heart from The Showdown, and fain would lie down. And what do I leave to my brother? My houses and my lands. Now make my bed soon, for I am sick at heart from The Resolution, and fain would lie down. And what do I leave to my true love? To my true love I leave hell and fire. Now make my bed quick—The Denouement has made me sick. I’m sick, and fain would lie down.
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